David Schneider On Twitter at Celebrity Tweets

celeb tweet user David Schneider

Followers: 165,999 as of 24 Apr 14 17:09:52

Bio: Actor, writer, comedian, fool.

Website: http://t.co/TDfy0liSpV


David Schneider twitter profile image
The Vine trailer for the movie Pompei. Very exciting. https://t.co/u5HlkGyj5N
Updated via Vine - Make a Scene at 24 Apr 2014 14:34
David Schneider twitter profile image
Very excited about getting into Vine because being on just the 6 social media platforms meant I was still getting some work done. (Help)
Updated via TweetDeck at 24 Apr 2014 13:39
David Schneider twitter profile image
This review in the Times totally nails the technical problems of #JamaicaInn pic.twitter.com/24y1kX6AfG
Updated via web at 24 Apr 2014 08:29
  • This review in the Times totally nails the technical problems of #JamaicaInn http://t.co/24y1kX6AfG
David Schneider twitter profile image
Today: "Stop our young people going to fight and die in Syria" Yesterday: "Make our young people go and fight and die in Syria" - Blair.
Updated via TweetDeck at 24 Apr 2014 07:19
David Schneider twitter profile image
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 24 Apr 2014 06:49
David Schneider twitter profile image
Updated via TweetDeck at 23 Apr 2014 20:12
  • RT @PrayForPatrick: Fair play to him. http://t.co/6e9HzszuZd
David Schneider twitter profile image
RT @Unnamedinsider: Newly discovered Mediaeval artefact shows where @UKIP got their poster ideas! #HappyStGeorgesDay pic.twitter.com/4cLEuTPZaQ
Updated via web at 23 Apr 2014 16:51
  • RT @Unnamedinsider: Newly discovered Mediaeval artefact shows where @ukip got their poster ideas! #HappyStGeorgesDay http://t.co/4cLEuTPZaQ
David Schneider twitter profile image
Rising cost of alcohol definitely the cause for drop in crime. I live next to Club Tropicana and it's a nightmare here.
Updated via TweetDeck at 23 Apr 2014 13:13
David Schneider twitter profile image
I think *actually* you'll find it's Francis Bacon's 450th birthday. Or Christopher Marlowe's. Maybe.
Updated via TweetDeck at 23 Apr 2014 12:46
David Schneider twitter profile image
RT @BuzzFeedUK: Shop name of the day: pic.twitter.com/EH88LHAQMl (via @jasonwoods1970)
Updated via TweetDeck at 23 Apr 2014 10:33
  • RT @BuzzFeedUK: Shop name of the day: http://t.co/EH88LHAQMl (via @jasonwoods1970)
David Schneider twitter profile image
A stirring poem about Englishness for St George's Day (done with the genius @SoVeryBritish for @HuffPostUKCom) http://t.co/W5g46MyDF6
Updated via TweetDeck at 23 Apr 2014 09:23
David Schneider twitter profile image
RT @paddypower: Heat map of Chelsea's performance last night pic.twitter.com/h58d7EScqX
Updated via web at 23 Apr 2014 08:55
  • RT @paddypower: Heat map of Chelsea's performance last night http://t.co/h58d7EScqX
David Schneider twitter profile image
"Improve any situation by intervening or bombing. Bad meal in a restaurant? Bomb. Poor phone signal? Bomb. Libya? Bomb" - Tony Blair.
Updated via TweetDeck at 23 Apr 2014 08:08
David Schneider twitter profile image
Of course if Farage had his way, St George would never have made it past immigration and we'd now be entirely populated by dragons #FACT
Updated via TweetDeck at 23 Apr 2014 07:10
David Schneider twitter profile image
I'm very much enjoying @UkipBillboards. Very interesting.
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 22 Apr 2014 16:37
David Schneider twitter profile image
Ironically, Gordon Brown weighing in for the No campaign and being listened to in Scotland proves it is indeed a different country #indyref
Updated via TweetDeck at 22 Apr 2014 10:19
David Schneider twitter profile image
Picture just in from Old Trafford #MUFC (with thanks @SimonHume) pic.twitter.com/wyXf1BSaXX
Updated via web at 22 Apr 2014 09:16
  • Picture just in from Old Trafford #MUFC 
(with thanks @simonhume) http://t.co/wyXf1BSaXX
David Schneider twitter profile image
"Oh, well, it's Tuesday. Everyone back to work… Not you, Moyes!"
Updated via TweetDeck at 22 Apr 2014 07:14
David Schneider twitter profile image
RT @UkipBillboards: Just spotted on the A406 pic.twitter.com/QtoIyYsxYp
Updated via TweetDeck at 21 Apr 2014 18:25
  • RT @UkipBillboards: Just spotted on the A406 http://t.co/QtoIyYsxYp
David Schneider twitter profile image
Don't worry about Moyes. He has a lucrative dismissal clause in the 6-year contract he signed with Chelsea, Man City, Liverpool and Arsenal.
Updated via TweetDeck at 21 Apr 2014 14:13
David Schneider twitter profile image
At this difficult time for the Man Utd manager, please join us again in the Moyes Prayer (with thanks @SimonHume) pic.twitter.com/ANcnFAXIQN
Updated via web at 21 Apr 2014 13:53
  • At this difficult time for the Man Utd manager, please join us again in the Moyes Prayer
(with thanks @simonhume) http://t.co/ANcnFAXIQN
David Schneider twitter profile image
At last a bakery that caters for diversity at this time of year (with thanks @davidlberesford) pic.twitter.com/OD3QnoqLHp
Updated via web at 21 Apr 2014 11:47
  • At last a bakery that caters for diversity at this time of year
(with thanks @davidlberesford) http://t.co/OD3QnoqLHp
David Schneider twitter profile image
Today's Easter reading is the Book of Etonians v.13: "And thou shalt clothe thyself in the love of Christ so as to nick votes from UKIP"
Updated via TweetDeck at 21 Apr 2014 08:31
David Schneider twitter profile image
Sorry. Typo on pic there. Taking it back into workshop...
Updated via TweetDeck at 20 Apr 2014 21:46
David Schneider twitter profile image
First foodbanks, now Daily Mail reveals feeding of the 5000 included asylum seekers and people who'd already received more than one miracle.
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 20 Apr 2014 15:35
David Schneider twitter profile image
RT @JoffThompson: @davidschneider I feel so stupid for not thinking of this myself... pic.twitter.com/E8iYuGlvA9
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 20 Apr 2014 13:45
  • RT @JoffThompson: @davidschneider I feel so stupid for not thinking of this myself... http://t.co/E8iYuGlvA9
David Schneider twitter profile image
Being in a mixed-faith family I brought up my kids to believe in the Easter rabbi.
Updated via web at 20 Apr 2014 12:09
David Schneider twitter profile image
Updated via Twitter for iPad at 20 Apr 2014 10:50
  • RT @Pandamoanimum: Happy Easter. http://t.co/Dn2s8Y72xu
David Schneider twitter profile image
Can someone persuade Cameron that most UKIP voters say their religion is Jedi so we can hear him talk endlessly about his Jedi faith?
Updated via web at 20 Apr 2014 09:14
David Schneider twitter profile image
Behold! I have risen... from my bed and my Twitterbreak. Good to see you all again *hugs you a little too hard*
Updated via web at 20 Apr 2014 08:30
David Schneider twitter profile image
Normal service will be resumed as soon as I'm back from holiday pic.twitter.com/UqTyt2ZKke
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 08 Apr 2014 13:34
  • Normal service will be resumed as soon as I'm back from holiday http://t.co/UqTyt2ZKke
David Schneider twitter profile image
Meanwhile you could follow @Unnamedinsider, @GeneralBoles @RogerQuimbly for satire; @Pandamoanimum @adamhess1 @cluedont for fun. Loves ya!
Updated via TweetDeck at 08 Apr 2014 12:25
David Schneider twitter profile image
Off on hols and Twitterbreak for a bit. Will rise again (topically enough) around Easter time...
Updated via TweetDeck at 08 Apr 2014 12:23
David Schneider twitter profile image
At last, it's Gogglebox on Gogglebox http://t.co/zkFnn4bNhg (done for @HuffPostUKCom)
Updated via TweetDeck at 08 Apr 2014 11:02
David Schneider twitter profile image
Pro-Russian demonstrators in Donetsk signal their control of parliament building by raising a flag of Nigel Farage.
Updated via TweetDeck at 08 Apr 2014 09:11
David Schneider twitter profile image
The Tories could have avoided Maria Millergate by making it clear that on 2nd homes the bedroom tax is replaced by a £45,000 bedroom bonus.
Updated via TweetDeck at 08 Apr 2014 08:01
David Schneider twitter profile image
Too awful RT @SkyNewsBreak: Sky Sources: Peaches Geldof found dead at her home in Wrotham in Kent aged 25
Updated via TweetDeck at 07 Apr 2014 17:16
David Schneider twitter profile image
Amazingly topical prediction from last night's #GameOfThrones (PS not a spoiler) pic.twitter.com/TB3PYN2i8b
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 07 Apr 2014 14:41
  • Amazingly topical prediction from last night's #GameOfThrones (PS not a spoiler) http://t.co/TB3PYN2i8b
David Schneider twitter profile image
I honestly don't know what's right about Syria but my hunch is always to go with the opposite of what Tony Blair thinks.
Updated via TweetDeck at 07 Apr 2014 12:28
David Schneider twitter profile image
RT @KateRobbins: I really would've refused this title if my surname was Garden pic.twitter.com/OnqSyckXhD
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 07 Apr 2014 10:22
  • RT @KateRobbins: I really would've refused this title if my surname was Garden http://t.co/OnqSyckXhD
David Schneider twitter profile image
"TGIM!" - Benjamin Button.
Updated via TweetDeck at 07 Apr 2014 07:54
David Schneider twitter profile image
About to go on @BBCOnTheMoney on @bbc5live. Might just use the facilities first pic.twitter.com/1JdRHZ6bHO
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 06 Apr 2014 18:27
  • About to go on @BBCOnTheMoney on @bbc5live. Might just use the facilities first http://t.co/1JdRHZ6bHO
David Schneider twitter profile image
Why have Arsenal collapsed this season? Questions must be asked about their medical team #EFCvAFC pic.twitter.com/rmBlrygZCg
Updated via web at 06 Apr 2014 14:28
  • Why have Arsenal collapsed this season? Questions must be asked about their medical team #EFCvAFC http://t.co/rmBlrygZCg
David Schneider twitter profile image
Release the fly-past! #EFCvAFC pic.twitter.com/DzZSRS2Yai
Updated via web at 06 Apr 2014 13:57
  • Release the fly-past! #EFCvAFC http://t.co/DzZSRS2Yai
David Schneider twitter profile image
Thanks to all those pointing out that Felix Magath is actually Penfold (and ta @GeneralBoles for pic) pic.twitter.com/8Q9O1i8ZWt
Updated via TweetDeck at 05 Apr 2014 22:30
  • Thanks to all those pointing out that Felix Magath is actually Penfold (and ta @GeneralBoles for pic) http://t.co/8Q9O1i8ZWt
David Schneider twitter profile image
Jermain wins! Yay! He's a dead cert for first black Labour leader. Unless he has a brother who'll pip him on union votes #thevoiceukFINAL
Updated via TweetDeck at 05 Apr 2014 20:02
David Schneider twitter profile image
The hacked Maria Miller tweets were only up a few seconds which is still longer than her apology (pic via @TVRav etc) pic.twitter.com/fMHepOZ1I4
Updated via TweetDeck at 05 Apr 2014 19:47
  • The hacked Maria Miller tweets were only up a few seconds which is still longer than her apology (pic via @TVRav etc) http://t.co/fMHepOZ1I4
David Schneider twitter profile image
It's the artist formerly known as Prince. Andrew #thevoiceukFINAL
Updated via TweetDeck at 05 Apr 2014 18:54
David Schneider twitter profile image
Still my favourite horse race: the Horsemeat Chase from last year's Ascot #grandnational (made for @HuffPostUKCom) http://t.co/fLexuKgNkE
Updated via TweetDeck at 05 Apr 2014 14:03
David Schneider twitter profile image
In honour of the #GrandNational, any cars having a technical malfunction at the Bahrain Grand Prix will be put down.
Updated via web at 05 Apr 2014 09:52
David Schneider twitter profile image
#FF Fans of love and/or beards might want to follow @Gordon_Soulmate
Updated via TweetDeck at 04 Apr 2014 16:46
David Schneider twitter profile image
Brucie's replacement for Strictly Come Dancing. Latest odds pic.twitter.com/felYXws3YV
Updated via web at 04 Apr 2014 15:58
  • Brucie's replacement for Strictly Come Dancing. Latest odds http://t.co/felYXws3YV
David Schneider twitter profile image
Latest #grandnational odds: Massive Horse Carnage 10-1; Animal Cruelty Laughter Spout 7-1; Equine Dignitas Disaster 5-2 fav
Updated via TweetDeck at 04 Apr 2014 13:37
David Schneider twitter profile image
Putin divorce latest. He's now on Tinder: http://t.co/YZCxlwecBS (done for @HuffPostUKCom)
Updated via TweetDeck at 04 Apr 2014 11:28
David Schneider twitter profile image
RT @HuffPostUKCom: £90 for an England shirt? That's nothing. Check out their pants: http://t.co/ehgAwUB4qh http://t.co/p6Yjatgo4M
Updated via web at 04 Apr 2014 09:02
David Schneider twitter profile image
Good to know the smog is caused by Saharan dust not cars, pollution etc. In other news, the banking crisis was caused by Saharan banks.
Updated via TweetDeck at 04 Apr 2014 07:55
David Schneider twitter profile image
Charge people £10 every time they try to sell off a bit of the NHS. Problem sorted #bbcqt
Updated via TweetDeck at 03 Apr 2014 22:16
David Schneider twitter profile image
Contractually, Nigel Farage has to be talked about for at least 10 minutes if he's not on the panel that week #bbcqt
Updated via TweetDeck at 03 Apr 2014 21:59
David Schneider twitter profile image
Cable: "The government got independent financial advice on Royal Mail from management consultants, Delboy Trotter Ltd" #bbcqt
Updated via TweetDeck at 03 Apr 2014 21:45
David Schneider twitter profile image
RT @TheMichaelMoran: If you MUST do it, do it with care. pic.twitter.com/vCfy8aW5NZ
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 03 Apr 2014 19:55
  • RT @TheMichaelMoran: If you MUST do it, do it with care. http://t.co/vCfy8aW5NZ
David Schneider twitter profile image
In case you've not seen it: the real reason behind Putin's divorce pic.twitter.com/TyjlmbWllb
Updated via web at 03 Apr 2014 18:13
  • In case you've not seen it: the real reason behind Putin's divorce http://t.co/TyjlmbWllb
David Schneider twitter profile image
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 03 Apr 2014 11:10
  • RT @TimeOutLondon: Perfect. RT @MarkMooney19 Love this: http://t.co/Y7H7Ie30Q9
David Schneider twitter profile image
Given that the smog's meant to come from the Sahara it seems right that the government's only response is to put its head in the sand.
Updated via web at 03 Apr 2014 09:08
David Schneider twitter profile image
Here's a thing I wrote for @guardian about rebranding Ed Miliband (my bit's at the bottom) http://t.co/pHgT2RCqcD
Updated via TweetDeck at 03 Apr 2014 08:05
David Schneider twitter profile image
Dunce of Downing Street: the movie http://t.co/68ji6Eq8Zu (done for @HuffPostUKCom)
Updated via TweetDeck at 02 Apr 2014 15:29
David Schneider twitter profile image
RT @GeneralBoles: Things David Cameron doesn't know the price of... pic.twitter.com/XAHoazWClD
Updated via web at 02 Apr 2014 11:17
  • RT @GeneralBoles: Things David Cameron doesn't know the price of... http://t.co/XAHoazWClD
David Schneider twitter profile image
House price rises in London now close to the magic 88% which allows them to travel through time.
Updated via TweetDeck at 02 Apr 2014 11:03
David Schneider twitter profile image
A plane just flew over Old Trafford saying "Guardiola Out" #MUFCBAYERN
Updated via TweetDeck at 01 Apr 2014 20:37
David Schneider twitter profile image
Having seen their bench I predict a Man Utd win tonight: Lindegaard, Hernandez, Nani, Young, Fletcher, Sheringham, Solskjaer #MUFCBAYERN
Updated via TweetDeck at 01 Apr 2014 18:41
David Schneider twitter profile image
Clegg v Farage: the rap battle http://t.co/AqfZgmrZvu (with @Unnamedinsider for @HuffPostUKCom)
Updated via TweetDeck at 01 Apr 2014 13:53
David Schneider twitter profile image
Just been slagging off lame April Fool mashups before realising that's what I do on here all year. *goes off to have long hard look at self*
Updated via TweetDeck at 01 Apr 2014 13:01
David Schneider twitter profile image
So the Royal Mail sale cost billions but at least the Sorry You Were Out cards were honest http://t.co/ekkqZkefz1 (done for @HuffPostUKCom)
Updated via TweetDeck at 01 Apr 2014 11:35
David Schneider twitter profile image
The inevitable consequence of #equalmarriage, as Lord Tebbit himself predicted pic.twitter.com/RNj1sog1xx
Updated via TweetDeck at 01 Apr 2014 09:08
  • The inevitable consequence of #equalmarriage, as Lord Tebbit himself predicted http://t.co/RNj1sog1xx
David Schneider twitter profile image
It's Star Wars Day! Happy April Fools. May the farce be with you.
Updated via TweetDeck at 01 Apr 2014 08:06
David Schneider twitter profile image
These April Fools are just too obvious RT @guardian: Royal Mail: undervaluing shares costs taxpayer £750m in one day http://t.co/jsidCiEFGj
Updated via TweetDeck at 01 Apr 2014 07:08
David Schneider twitter profile image
The board of Tory achievements behind Osborne today was a bit more honest than expected http://t.co/mB2Dlx4UIL (done for @HuffPostUKCom)
Updated via TweetDeck at 31 Mar 2014 16:10
David Schneider twitter profile image
Here's a cheery thing. Pharrell's "Happy" danced to by youtubers. (made for @HuffPostUKCom) http://t.co/5gWHyieJut
Updated via TweetDeck at 31 Mar 2014 15:33
David Schneider twitter profile image
Looking forward to catching the finale of the Walking Dead or, as it's also known, the England cricket team.
Updated via TweetDeck at 31 Mar 2014 13:14
David Schneider twitter profile image
I think the Labour peer who said everyone should pay £10 a month to the NHS accidentally put his clock back 70 years this weekend.
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 31 Mar 2014 11:55
David Schneider twitter profile image
Farage demands referendum on whether we should be part of the Russian Federation > MT @theipaper: Farage: Putin is the leader I most admire
Updated via TweetDeck at 31 Mar 2014 08:13
David Schneider twitter profile image
I bet if you read the small print of the budget you'll see that people earning over £300K didn't actually lose an hour over the weekend.
Updated via web at 31 Mar 2014 07:31
David Schneider twitter profile image
Honest teenager's Mother's Day present pic.twitter.com/bhm4Etqq7l
Updated via TweetDeck at 30 Mar 2014 14:03
  • Honest teenager's Mother's Day present http://t.co/bhm4Etqq7l
David Schneider twitter profile image
"Yippee ki yay, mother!" - Bruce Willis visits his mum on #MothersDay
Updated via TweetDeck at 30 Mar 2014 11:27
David Schneider twitter profile image
Forgot to get a gift for my mum but I sure managed to save the day with this pic.twitter.com/8B1EqhNO11
Updated via Twitter for iPhone at 30 Mar 2014 09:30
  • Forgot to get a gift for my mum but I sure managed to save the day with this http://t.co/8B1EqhNO11
David Schneider twitter profile image
Porn stars. Don't forget to put your cocks forward tonight.
Updated via TweetDeck at 29 Mar 2014 22:34
David Schneider twitter profile image
Long-term followers will welcome/abhor the following traditional biannual tweet...
Updated via TweetDeck at 29 Mar 2014 22:33
David Schneider twitter profile image
Music fact. Shakira's full name is Shaki Nstevens Ra #thevoiceuk
Updated via TweetDeck at 29 Mar 2014 20:40
David Schneider twitter profile image
Oh dear. Hastily arranged fly-past at the Emirates just now (with thanks @GeneralBoles) #AFCvMCFC pic.twitter.com/WS5KaQ5MtF
Updated via TweetDeck at 29 Mar 2014 18:32
  • Oh dear. Hastily arranged fly-past at the Emirates just now 
(with thanks @GeneralBoles)
#AFCvMCFC http://t.co/WS5KaQ5MtF
David Schneider twitter profile image
So proud of this country over #equalmarriage. It's like the Olympics all over again. Go TeamLGBT!
Updated via TweetDeck at 29 Mar 2014 13:10
David Schneider twitter profile image
Old Trafford fly-past latest. Looks like Moyes has hired his own plane (with thanks @SimonHume) #MUFC pic.twitter.com/Rh6AZgG6Bd
Updated via web at 29 Mar 2014 11:58
  • Old Trafford fly-past latest. Looks like Moyes has hired his own plane
(with thanks @simonhume) #MUFC http://t.co/Rh6AZgG6Bd
David Schneider twitter profile image
Moyes has made sure the plane flying over Old Trafford will be piloted by Tom Cleverley so it should miss by a mile #MUFC
Updated via TweetDeck at 29 Mar 2014 11:31
David Schneider twitter profile image
I try not to judge people but if you do a harmony at the end of "Happy Birthday", you leave me no choice.
Updated via TweetDeck at 29 Mar 2014 09:57
David Schneider twitter profile image
RT @ajpillar1: @davidschneider the start of F1 qualifying in Malaysia has been delayed by rain caused by 15 equal marriages in UK
Updated via TweetDeck at 29 Mar 2014 08:53
David Schneider twitter profile image
Happy New Era! #EqualMarriage *links arms and sings* "Let auld discrimination be forgot and never brought to mind..."
Updated via Twitter for iPad at 29 Mar 2014 00:02
David Schneider twitter profile image
Something about the government's Chief Medical Officer makes me worry they're not serious about tackling obesity pic.twitter.com/DSU5yEPuRQ
Updated via TweetDeck at 28 Mar 2014 15:41
  • Something about the government's Chief Medical Officer makes me worry they're not serious about tackling obesity http://t.co/DSU5yEPuRQ
David Schneider twitter profile image
Michael Gove raps https://t.co/JYf7WGIn5K
Updated via Vine - Make a Scene at 28 Mar 2014 13:50
David Schneider twitter profile image
When it comes to buying tickets, remember: a bird in the hand is worth two for Kate Bush.
Updated via TweetDeck at 28 Mar 2014 12:43
David Schneider twitter profile image
I won't miss ATOS but I'll miss the simplicity of their forms pic.twitter.com/VRcepkxdcX
Updated via web at 28 Mar 2014 10:39
  • I won't miss ATOS but I'll miss the simplicity of their forms http://t.co/VRcepkxdcX
David Schneider twitter profile image
Argh! Posted wrong pic there. Sorry. Trying again...
Updated via TweetDeck at 28 Mar 2014 10:36

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